In 1998 I performed my first ever Entertainment Hypnosis show in a military bar on Camp Pendleton. I was given an opportunity to prove myself worthy by a sixty year old five-foot-two-ball-of-fire female bar manager.
"Tits and ass are what will bring my Marines into this bar on a Wednesday night", she said. I knew I had a decision to make. I could be offended or prove that I could deliver a legitimately phenomenol show beyond sex appeal. Marilyn Monroe said, "If I'd observed all the rules, I'd never got anywhere."
I decided to play by my own rules.
My husband Troy and I visited his neighbor who was a successful commercial photographer and he agreed to let us bring Troy's Harley into his studio for a photo shoot. We created Americana; knee high boots, short skirt and cleavage sitting upon a Harley. We snapped the photos and brought them back to the bar manager. Little miss fire-ball had them printed into poster advertisements and plastered them all over Camp Pendleton. She was right. The bar was full on Wednesday night.
I was scared as hell, worried that I'd be inarticulate or not remember what to do next. Seventy fives minutes of speaking in front of an audience was terrifying. Carrying the entire experience on my words, my energy was daunting. But I had a vision that led me there, and I knew that moment was seeded fifteen years earlier as a teenager. I trusted my vision even though I had no idea how it would happen, and never did I think it would be as a Stage Hypnotist, but there I was.
Over an hour of mind blowing fun later, having raised the morale and enlightened the spirits of a packed room of Marines, my show was a success. Immediately after, I was rebooked and not only at that bar but at every bar on Camp Pendleton and other bases too. This was the very first move I had ever made toward my own financial empowerment, and the beginning of learning how to use my power effectively.
An image may have opened the door, but showcasing true power is what delivered continued success. Since then, I’ve grown through some tough experiences of not being taken seriously. I’ve shifted my image, my branding and how I deliver this amazing work that I love so much. I am not ashamed that I used my assets to further my goals. I view it as smart and determined. I knew I had something greater to offer and I have been acknowledged for that. The Marines contracted me for Stop Smoking seminars and Tour after Tour entertaining Troops at bases across America and Asia for twenty years. Countless Marines have empowered their mindset having experienced my presentations.
Owning your worth is an inside job that reflects outwardly in your work and career. It requires self trust in your decision making and a great deal of knowing who you are. That of course does not happen all at once. Don’t wait until you fully know yourself to step in. Learn in action. In each step forward use the opportunities that surface to disempower old beliefs.
There are five vital principles to leaping into leadership as a woman of worth.
1. Embodying worthiness and your self value
2. Gracefully practicing assertiveness and decision making
3. Becoming more comfortable with power by way of being uncomfortable and doing things scared
4. Internalizing a goal to trust yourself
5. Practical willingness to do the work and owning a higher level of responsibility
As a motivational Hypnotist and mindset coach my goal is to be your facilitator. Not your guru or your savior but the bridge or catalyst to your desired goal of serving at a higher level. Women of worth know to practice these leadership principles mentioned above and they use one essential emotion to drive the behaviors that support their goals. It is courage. Maya Angelou said, “Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can't practice any other virtue consistently.” Courage is an emotion that you can think of as a ladder. It will deliver you from low-level emotions like fear, anger, grief and powerlesseness and provide you the boost you need to reach freedom, love and gratitude.
Owning your self value may very well be at the core of materializing your dreams and aspirations, allowing you to propser in all areas of your life. No longer will you put yourself on the clearance rack, or undercut your own worth by over-eating, choosing the wrong relationship, getting paid less than you deserve or numbing your woes with a variety of addictions.
Feminine power allows us to lead in ways that honor emotional intelligence and depth of character. We focus on collaboration versus hierarchy. The more we are explorers of our own truth and willing to do the inside work, the higher we rise and more effectively we lead.
For centuries, stand out women have threatened perceived power and caused us to look deeper within ourselves, questioning our belief systems and who we authentically are at the core of our being. Be that woman. Epitomize courage and forge a path of leadership that beckons all of us to stand in our worth. Not everyone will like you, yet everyone will have been impacted by your courage.